selecting a therapist-8 QUALITIES to look for

We believe that the client/therapist relationship is the most important decision we make. First and foremost, we understand you have a story to tell. And we want to ensure that you only have to tell your story one time. Therefore, we make every effort to connect you with a counselor that you will feel comfortable with and one that has the education, knowledge, and experience to guide you through your counseling experience. With that being said, it is up to you to let us know how we are doing and if changes need to be made on your behalf.

Tell your story.  Share your experiences with a trusted friend or therapist.  If privacy is a concern, travel outside of your hometown to see a counselor.  Secrets hide in the darkness where they fester, grow and become deep emotional wounds. If you put a bandaid on a moist wound it may become infected.  Expose the same injury to the sun and you can almost see the wound heal before your eyes. It is my opinion that traumatic events need to be processed.  You cannot heal that which you do not confront.  If not, a painful experience can be pushed back into your mind, then triggered later in life with a new loss or critical incident. 

Alan H. Cohen gives 8 qualities to look for in a good therapist, teacher, minister, counselor or coach:  

A good therapist draws forth the best in you rather than continually directing your attention to what is wrong with you.   When you walk out of a session, do you feel lighter, freer, and stronger, or do you feel stuck and confused?

A good therapist is relatively happy and healthy.  While it is unfair to expect a therapist to be a paragon of perfection, their demeanor should demonstrate the kind of attitude and energy you aspire to experience.

A good therapist is authentic and walks their talk.  Their life reflects the values they express and suggest for you.  They acknowledge that they, too, are on a journey of awakening. Sometimes you can learn more from a therapist’s humanity than their philosophy.

A good therapist strives to move you through the therapeutic process as quickly as possible.  Be wary of therapists who try to keep you in therapy for their own purposes.

A good therapist sets appropriate boundaries.  When they say no if you ask them to cross their boundary, they are teaching you to say no when you need to do the same.

A good therapist assists you to contact your own inner wisdom.  They acknowledge that you know your own answers and their role is to help you develop the skills to unearth them.  They will never try to force you to follow their direction.  They may suggest and guide, but the choice is always yours.

A good therapist acknowledges that you are a multi-dimensional being.  Their therapy program addresses all levels of your life rather than just one.  They respect and support you to nourish all these aspects of yourself and keep them in balance.

A good therapist places service and healing before money, power, or sex.  They are there to serve, not to feed their ego.